In spirit of Valentine's Day, here's a little short story I wrote in college (and one of the short stories that led to one of the best conversations I've had with my Uncle Mark, ever).. :) Who knows...might turn into an actual novel eventually.
This is also consequentially the short story that got me rejected from an MFA program. (I laugh about it all the time.) :P I've tweaked/edited it a little since, and I know it needs more work.
The Gun or the Girl
Year 1992
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Arnie sat alone in his
bedroom with his 1873 Colt Peacemaker. He loved this gun because it was one of
the first repeating handguns ever made. He hadn’t paid much attention to it in
a while so he needed to clean it.
The Colt was very
special to Arnie because his brother, Steve, gave it to him in when they were
in their late twenties. Steve learned to drive a truck when he was eighteen. It
was while he was working in New York that he got the gun.
“You won’t believe it!” Steve said enthusiastically, walking in the
door. Arnie hadn’t seen him in a week. His fly away auburn hair frizzed under
his baseball cap and he hadn’t shaved since December. “John Wayne gave this to
me! I ran into him while I was dropping off a shipment near Broadway.”
Steve
proudly opened a cardboard box to reveal the gun.
“I
love you deeply,” Arnie said, putting his tools down near the couch. “But you’re
full of shit.”
Steve always loved
telling stories to his wife, Cora. Cora was a good natured girl that humored
his brother when she shouldn’t have. It was that, and her passion for animals,
that caused Steve to fall in love with her when he was twenty-five. They met in
a pet store where she helped the owner raise baby parrots.
Cora was on the verge
of getting evicted. Steve felt sorry for her. They got pregnant with their
daughter after three months.
Cora refused to marry
Steve at first, and that caused a huge rift between her and their Mom. Arnie
tried talking Mom into trying to accept Cora into the family but she just
wouldn’t do it, even after Steve and Cora declared a common law marriage. It
was in ’85, when Steve and Cora had a real wedding after their son was born,
that Mom finally gave in and accepted her into the family.
Steve told exaggerated stories.
Cora loved his story about a “street fight”
he got into once.
“So
me, and my buddy Jimmy, start rough housing.”
Arnie
rolled his eyes.
It
was a sunny afternoon on the Fourth of July. They had the family barbeque
planned for months in Mom’s back yard. The smell of grilled hamburger and
chicken wafted through the air, making his mouth water. Cora bounced the baby
on her knee while she smiled wide and gave her husband her full attention.
“Jimmy,
the knuckle head that he is, gets pissed off and starts a real fight after I
mention he owes me twenty bucks for cigarettes two weeks ago. He punched me in
the gut too hard, I get pissed off, grab Jimmy by the shoulders, and bite his
ear off!”
“Ew,
Steve!” Cora gasped, her eyebrows scrunching together in disgust.
Arnie
burst out laughing despite how distractingly beautiful Cora was with her perm,
long brown hair, and very little make up.
“You
are so full of shit,” he said. “You were fifteen. Me and Mom broke that fight
up and Jimmy busted you really good in the jaw.”
Steve
glared at him.
In 1990, Steve died in that fucking rig. Two
months after Cora and Steve had a second boy.
It wasn’t just the gun Steve gave Arnie which
he cherished. Two years before Steve died, they had some work they had to do on
the car after another driver flew past him by running a red light. They got it
running while they were teenagers, but Steve often helped Arnie give it tune
ups.
“I
think you fried your clutch,” Steve said after a few minutes of failing to get
the car to move.
“Great.
I can’t believe that moron pulled in front of me.”
“I
can’t believe you tried to stop in the wrong gear,” Steve said. “This car is a
baby. I told you it was when I decided you’d be the one to keep it.”
Arnie
threw a greasy towel at his head. “You gave it to me because it’s too flashy
for Cora and the kids.”
“Are
you kidding me? Cora loves this car. She’s always asking me to get it from you
so we can go for a drive.”
Arnie
wanted to answer his brother, but he shook head at Steve and threw a greasy rag
at his brother’s head. “Well, while we’ve got it open, does it need anything
else?”
Rag
still on his head, Steve fiddled around some more with the engine.
“Oil
change. Your spark plugs look rough. Did you let Mom drive o Vegas again?”
“Well,
she couldn’t take the station wagon.”
Steve
shook his head and threw the rag off his head on the side of the car. “Arnie,
come on. I’m going to have to take the car from you. I go out of town for two
weeks and everything on the car starts falling apart. I didn’t almost get my
jaw unhinged trying to get Jimmy to stop being an ass and help us just so you
could let it rot like this.”
“Calm
down. It just needs a little maintenance. What’s wrong?”
Steve
sighed and closed the hood of the car.
“I’m
just tired of being on the road all the time.” Steve walked over to the driver’s
door and leaned against the car, as Arnie had been the entire time. The hood
was up and one of the tires were also flat from the near-accident which caused
Arnie to need Steve in the first place. I haven’t told Cora, but I really think
I want to stop driving a truck.”
“What
would you do? You used to love driving trucks.”
“Yeah,
Arnie… but driving all the time takes time away from Cora and the kids. You’re
there a lot for them but it doesn’t feel right to have my brother be there for
my wife when I can’t be.” Steve’s hair was still long, and he brushed it out of
his face. As adults, both Arnie and Steve kept mustaches and had gained a
little weight, Arnie more so than Steve.
Arnie
clapped his brother on the back.
“Steve,
you know I love Cora. You couldn’t have chosen a better girl. But you need to
think this through before you quit your job.”
“I
don’t want to raise my family in the city. I think I want to move out of
Philly.”
“What?”
Arnie wasn’t sure if he was stunned or not.
“Yeah…
Cora always talks about how she used to live in in the south a year before she
decided she wanted to move up north. We don’t want the kids in a city
environment. I want to raise them on home cooking and—“
“Steve,
I love you, but good luck getting that past Mom.”
Steve
had always been a big dreamer. Arnie just never thought he would dream about
something so different.
“I’m
just thinking about it. It doesn’t mean I’m going to,” Steve said.
“If
you moved down there, I’d never be able to keep this car running,” Arnie said.
Steve
laughed and pulled out a cigarette. “Yeah, I know Arnie. That’s why I’m
thinking the whole moving idea is a bad idea, even though I want to do what
Cora wants.”
Arnie took in a deep
breath and set about cleaning the pistol, inspecting the bores. They were
tarnished and rough-looking. The entire gun looked dull and neglected. His
cleaning kit sat on his bed, each bore brush and cleaning cloth neatly lined up
against his pillows.
He couldn’t help but
remember his brother. Losing Steve hit everyone hard when it happened four
years ago, but Arnie had to stop and remember to breathe slowly as he picked up
a bore brush and inserted it into the gun. He hadn’t touched it since Steve’s
funeral.
“Arnie?”
Arnie sighed when his
mother knocked on his bedroom door. Mom was in her early sixties and sounded
like a fishwife when she raised her voice. Arnie frequently had to endure her
nagging. Mom let him live at home. Arnie didn’t have to pay rent, but he still
insisted on helping her pay the utilities. Mom owned some property, and she
rented it out to roomers who sometimes came to her for cigarettes and beer.
Some of the guys she let rent from her weren’t the best people, and so Arnie
wanted to live with her at home so he could make sure she was safe. Mom always
refused to work a practical job because she didn’t have the skills. She
inherited the property she owned from Arnie and Steve’s dad once he died. They
lost their dad when they were young.
“Arnie? Come out here for a
minute. Lauren called.”
“All right, I’m coming,
Mom.” Arnie sat on his bed for a moment longer and studied the gun before he
closed the barrel and set it on his nightstand.
“Well, hurry! I haven’t
got all day. I have to go over to the house in Doylestown and ask the tenants
there why they haven’t paid rent yet this month.”
Breathing heavily,
Arnie stretched, popping his back. He unchained his door and opened it. “I told
her I’d call her when I was ready.”
“What have you been
doing?” Mom looked Arnie up and down.
Arnie didn’t think of
himself as much to look at. He was slightly overweight. His belly hung over his
jeans. He scratched the bald spot on the crown of his head as he looked at Mom.
“I, uh, got out the
Colt.” Arnie shuffled his bare feet on the cool tile of the floor.
“Oh, you brought that out?” Mom put her hand
on Arnie’s shoulder. “Are you okay? It’s getting pretty close to January.”
“I’m fine.” Arnie shrugged Mom’s hand off his
shoulder. “Is Lauren still on the phone?”
“No,” his mother said.
She brushed her short curly hair behind her ears. “Where are you taking her
tonight?”
“I don’t know; somewhere
fancier than the usual diner.”
Arnie’s mother took in
a sharp breath. “Are you finally going to propose?” A wide smile spread on her
face. Her hand shot to his arm. “It’s about time!”
“It’s just her
birthday. I might just decide I don’t want to drive far and take her to the
Spaghetti Warehouse.” Arnie thought about shaking Mom’s hand off, but he
didn’t.
Arnie felt like he was
in a good place with his girlfriend. Cora introduced Arnie to Lauren at a
Tupperware party. Cora temporarily sold it in an attempt to have something to
do a year after Steve died. Neither one of the girls were the slight bit interested
in Tupperware now. Cora focused more on painting, her real passion, and Lauren
was attending community college while she worked as a night desk receptionist
at the hotel Arnie worked at as an electrician. Arnie stalled starting a family
after Steve died. Maybe it was because he was afraid the same thing would
happen to his family if he got married—he’d have a few good years with his
wife, have a few kids, and then die on them.
“That’s still a really nice
restaurant.” Except, Arnie thought to himself, his entire family ate there
regularly. “It’s about time you give me grand babies. Have you both gotten more
serious?”
Arnie thought about
that for a moment. He peaked back into his room and looked at the black box
which sat next to his Peacemaker. He didn’t have his bedroom door opened so he
could hide the box. If Mom saw it, she’d become so excited, Arnie would be
afraid she would have a heart attack. “Ah, I like her.”
“Oh! That reminds me,” Mom
said. “Cora is bringing the kids over this weekend.”
“Aw,” Arnie said. “I
have to work a little overtime at the hotel this weekend.”
Arnie thought he
sometimes worked too much, but his relationship with Lauren wasn’t what
suffered. His relationship with Cora and his niece and nephews suffered. He
tried to spend time with them as much as possible. The kids were the closet
thing Arnie had left of Steve, besides the Colt, and it broke his heart they
didn’t have a father.
“It’s okay.” His mother
pushed her glasses onto her face. “Well, I’ll leave you to get ready. Lauren
asked me to tell you to make sure you pick her up at seven-thirty.”
Arnie told her he would
get her at nine. He looked at his watch. It was six-thirty. Lauren consistently
tried to move time around on him. She had a controlling personality, and most
of the time Arnie let it go. He was nowhere near ready to go out, though. He
needed to shower and finish cleaning the gun.
“All right,” he said to
his mother. He kissed her on the cheek. “Why are you going to collect rent so
late?”
His mother flashed a
semi-evil half-grin. “Don’t ask, dear.”
Arnie didn’t ask.
Thirty minutes later,
Arnie had on a nice t-shirt and slacks. He had the box in his right pocket
along with his keys and wallet. His mother’s house was large. With three floors
and five bedrooms, and a large basement and attic, it was sometimes an arduous
walk from one end of the house to the other.
Arnie was almost out
the door when the phone which sat on a table near the front door started to
ring.
“Hello?”
“Arnie! I was hoping to
catch Nadine,” Cora said through the phone.
“Mom’s gone out. I
think she’s breaking into a tenant’s house to collect some rent collateral.”
“Again? I hope she
doesn’t hurt herself. Shouldn’t you be out there with her?”
Arnie laughed. Mom only
broke into a tenant’s house once when she thought they brought drugs into the
place. She didn’t care about privacy laws, and that sometimes got her into
trouble. It was another reason Arnie still lived with her. He didn’t want to
control Mom, but he also didn’t want her to do something stupid.
“She probably is just issuing an eviction
notice.” Arnie said. “Is everything okay? I’m supposed to head over to Lauren’s.”
“Oh! Is it the big
night?”
Arnie stuck his hand
into his pocket and fingered the box. He hadn’t meant to tell Cora he wanted to
propose to Lauren.
“Arnie?”
“I’m still here, Cora.”
“It’s okay. I know it’s
the big night. You don’t have to say anything, because I know it must be
scaring the hell out of you. Just take a deep breath before you do it and don’t
worry—you aren’t making a mistake!”
“Thanks, Cora.” Arnie
said. He heaved a huge sigh of relief. “I needed to hear that.”
“I’m already mom and
dad. I can be sister and brother too.”
Arnie laughed. “Okay. I
have to go. I might not be around to see the kids this weekend, but love you
all.”
“Good luck! Love you
too.”
“I thought you were
NEVER going to get here!” Lauren said as soon as Arnie knocked on her door.
He looked at the
flowers in his hand; a dozen roses. Lauren didn’t even give the flowers a
second thought as she flitted past him. Arnie caught a whiff of her vanilla
perfume and coughed. Lauren always wore too much. Her tall black heels clacked
noisily down her apartment steps as she walked to his red ’75 Corvette
convertible.
Arnie loved his gun and
his car, even though it wasn’t his only one. Arnie also owned a Chevy Malibu he
drove for every-day errands. When Arnie was sixteen, and Steve was fourteen,
Steve helped Arnie restore the Corvette after they found it in a junk yard. The
radiator was busted in from a telephone pole, the owner of the junkyard said,
and it hadn’t been touched since. The hood had been a crumpled mess. For a year
and a half the boys scraped and begged for money from Mom so they could work on
it. Arnie got his first job working at a diner down the street to earn cash
too. Arnie would never forget Steve’s face when they finally started the engine.
It purred. Steve immediately wanted to try to repair another car. Maybe that
was why Steve ended up driving a truck.
“Oh, this car?” More
heel clacking. “I love this one!”
Lauren must not really
like flowers, or else she was just too excited to get out to really notice
them, Arnie reasoned with himself. He placed the flowers on a table near the
front door and closed it. Using a key he had to her apartment, he locked it.
“It makes you look
gorgeous.” He walked down the apartment steps. Arnie actually felt a bit of
indifference toward her light blue dress.
“Don’t flatter me,” she
laughed. “I need a night out on the town. I had a rough day at work.” She ran
her hand through her hair. Lauren usually worked the night shift at the hotel,
as Arnie did. “I can’t believe they
ordered me to come in this morning.”
“You shouldn’t let the
managers push you around. I was actually thinking we would go somewhere nicer
tonight,” Arnie said as he opened the passenger door. Lauren sat down.
Arnie got in on the
other side, and then started his car up.
“So where are we
going?” Lauren asked.
“I was thinking the
Spaghetti Warehouse,” Arnie said.
“Oh, really? But there
are so many carbs there… I’m not sure if I want to do that.”
“They
have salads.” Lauren was very self-conscious about her health, and Arnie tried
to appreciate that about her. He looked down at his gut as he shifted the car
in reverse and put his feet on the gas and released the clutch.
He kept fiddling with
the ring box in his pocket the entire time they ate dinner. Lauren finally
relented to the Spaghetti Warehouse because of the classic Cesar salad, while
Arnie ordered the five layer lasagna and the sampler plate. Lauren kept giving
him confused looks every time he fiddled with something in his pocket, and it
made Arnie more nervous about popping the question.
“So…” Lauren started.
“Ah, hell, I’m just
gonna ask.” Arnie pulled out the ring and opened it. It was a nice ring, with a
large diamond in the middle. He had placed a down payment on it. The engagement
ring was the first part of the whole set, as the wedding ring sat in place
underneath it. It was something Cora recommended when he started looking since
that was what Steve bought for her when they got married. “Lauren, will you
marry me?”
Arnie froze up while he
held the ring up to her. Lauren dropped her salad fork, staring at the ring.
For a moment he thought she was going to say no until she snatched it up out of
the box. She held it between her index finger and thumb, her eyes wide as she
looked at it.
“Oh—Arnie,
of course I will!”
After dinner, Arnie and
Lauren decided to go back to his house to spend some time together. Lauren
couldn’t wait to tell Mom, and Arnie tried to tell her she also had Bingo and a
senior citizen’s meeting, but he decided to go home anyway.
Lauren held his hand as
they walked up the steps to his bedroom.
“You’d have to move out
of your Mom’s house,” she said, wrapping one of her arms around Arnie’s
tighter.
“I’ve got some money
saved, but not much. I thought maybe we could rent a while.”
Arnie knew Lauren would
want him to move out of his Mom’s after they got married. Thinking about it
now, though, made his hands sweat. He wasn’t sure how his mother would do if he
left her alone.
Lauren shook her head.
“I hate renting. I just throw so much money with rent.”
“Mom wouldn’t mind
letting us stay here. She doesn’t make me pay rent.”
“I really, really don’t
want to live with your Mom, Arnie.”
Arnie opened his
bedroom door. His light was still on as he ended up rushing around to get ready
before his date with Lauren. He got nervous right after his talk with Mom. The
Colt was still on his bed.
“Oh, you have that
out,” Lauren said as she walked into his bedroom. She sat on a chair toward the
end of the bed which sat next to the wall.
Arnie quickly picked up
the gun and shut the barrel. He picked up the bore brush kit and closed it and
shoved the bullets into his nightstand. “It was a gift from my brother.”
“Yeah… isn’t it old?
Worth something?” Lauren sat up straighter in his chair. Arnie sat on his bed
and placed the gun on the nightstand on top of the bore brush kit.
“Yeah. It is. Did I
ever tell you the story Steve told me when he got it?”
“No, you didn’t.”
Lauren stood and sat next to him on the bed. She placed her hand on Arnie’s
knee. “Could you?”
“Steve was always full
of it. I think you would’ve liked him. He said he got this gun from John
Wayne.”
“No way!” Lauren
laughed loudly. She startled Arnie when she slapped him on the shoulder. “So
it’s old then?”
“It’s an 1873 Colt
Peacemaker,” Arnie said. “Classic.”
“But isn’t John Wayne
dead?” Lauren asked.
“Yes. Steve didn’t pay
attention to that stuff. John Wayne may have owned it,” Arnie picked up the gun
and showed it to her. “Steve probably just found it in a pawn shop, and the
person who had it didn’t realize what it was worth.”
“That’s so fascinating. How much do you think
it’s worth?”
Arnie shrugged,
suddenly feeling uncomfortable with the way Lauren was phrasing her questions.
People had asked him how much the gun was worth before, after Steve gave it to
him. For a while, Arnie did let people see the gun. That was before Steve died.
“It’s invaluable.”
“Maybe we could sell
it—and the Corvette. Can you imagine what kind of money we could get toward the
wedding and a down payment for a house?”
Arnie suddenly stood
up. “You know I worked on that car with Steve.”
“You really need to let
his death go. It’s pathetic.”
Arnie’s back stiffened.
He felt some of his hair stand on the back of his neck.
“Are you really telling
me you want me to sell the two things I have left from my brother?”
“Oh, come on, you have
pictures of him or—“
“I’m not marrying you!”
Arnie hated raising his voice, but he didn’t know any other way to grab
Lauren’s attention. “Give me the ring back.”
“What?” Lauren’s eyes
widened. “I’m trying to be practical.”
“Cora and Mom want me
to be on my own but they’d never suggest
I get rid of my gun and car. We’ve been together a year and you haven’t realized
that?”
“I’m not Cora.” Lauren
stood up and crossed her arms.
“Yeah, you sure aren’t.
Give me the ring back.”
“Fine! Whatever.” Lauren
yanked the ring from her hand. “It looks stupid anyway.” She threw it at his
chest. Her heels clacked against the floor as she walked down the hallway.
Arnie was breathing
hard. He didn’t know when he started breathing hard. He looked at the gun. Had
he really just broken up with Lauren?
He
needed to go somewhere.
It was only 9:30. He
could go see Cora. Arnie hoped the kids were still up—Zack, Cora’s youngest,
looked just like Steve.
He knocked on Cora’s
door. Children squealed and a dog barked as the dead bolt on the front door
unlocked.
“Arnie? I thought you
were on a date with Lauren?” Cora asked. She had her hair piled atop her head
in a messy pony tail. Kyle, three years old, stood next to her. He smiled wide
when he looked up at Arnie.
“Could I spend time
with you and the kids?” Arnie asked Cora.
“No problem! Are you
okay? Did she say no?” Cora asked. She stepped out of the way to let Arnie
inside.
“She just wasn’t what I
thought I wanted.” Arnie bent down and immediately picked up Kyle, hugging him
tightly as his other nephew and niece attached themselves to his pant leg.
“I—what do you want?
Because, Arnie, I think I’m going to follow Steve’s dream and move out of the
city.”
Arnie looked up at Cora
sharply, a deep, painful burn suddenly building in his chest.
“How long have you been
thinking about doing this?” he asked.
“I’ve been thinking
about it for a long time… I don’t want you to say anything to Nadine! She’d be
so mad… but I think I might have found a job down there. I started looking when
you told me you wanted to get married to Lauren.”
Arnie looked down at
Kyle, still clinging to his pants.
“You can’t move, Cora,
what about the kids?”
“I really think they
are going to do better. The job I found, it’s working with horses, and—“
“It’s an incredibly
stupid idea!” Arnie said, raising his voice. He raised his voice so loud, Kyle
jumped back, tears welling up in his eyes. His niece stood there too, startled.
“Um, kids,” Cora said.
She knealt down to them, and gave them a hug and a kiss each. “Can you go up to
bed? Mommy will be upstairs in few minutes to tuck you into bed.”
“Okay, mommy,” Arnie’s
niece said. “I love you, uncle Arnie! Night!”
“Night, kids…” Arnie
almost couldn’t get the words out. He almost couldn’t look at his brother’s
kids.
“Arnie, I don’t know
what is going on with you… and you can stay the night, but I think you need to
call Lauren in the morning and try to fix things with her. If I want to move
with my kids, I will, because I want to have the chance to give them a better
life, something I don’t think I can give them in the city. You can sleep in the
basement, in on Steve’s old pull out sofa.”
Arnie wasn’t sure what
to say to his sister in law. He wasn’t even sure what he was doing there,
trying to be there for his dead brother’s kids and his dead brother’s wife.
“Cora, haven’t you ever
thought about us—“
“Don’t, Arnie!” Her
voice broke. “Just don’t. Good night, I have to tuck the kids in.”The Gun or the Girl
Year 1992
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Arnie sat alone in his
bedroom with his 1873 Colt Peacemaker. He loved this gun because it was one of
the first repeating handguns ever made. He hadn’t paid much attention to it in
a while so he needed to clean it.
The Colt was very
special to Arnie because his brother, Steve, gave it to him in when they were
in their late twenties. Steve learned to drive a truck when he was eighteen. It
was while he was working in New York that he got the gun.
“You won’t believe it!” Steve said enthusiastically, walking in the
door. Arnie hadn’t seen him in a week. His fly away auburn hair frizzed under
his baseball cap and he hadn’t shaved since December. “John Wayne gave this to
me! I ran into him while I was dropping off a shipment near Broadway.”
Steve
proudly opened a cardboard box to reveal the gun.
“I
love you deeply,” Arnie said, putting his tools down near the couch. “But you’re
full of shit.”
Steve always loved
telling stories to his wife, Cora. Cora was a good natured girl that humored
his brother when she shouldn’t have. It was that, and her passion for animals,
that caused Steve to fall in love with her when he was twenty-five. They met in
a pet store where she helped the owner raise baby parrots.
Cora was on the verge
of getting evicted. Steve felt sorry for her. They got pregnant with their
daughter after three months.
Cora refused to marry
Steve at first, and that caused a huge rift between her and their Mom. Arnie
tried talking Mom into trying to accept Cora into the family but she just
wouldn’t do it, even after Steve and Cora declared a common law marriage. It
was in ’85, when Steve and Cora had a real wedding after their son was born,
that Mom finally gave in and accepted her into the family.
Steve told exaggerated stories.
Cora loved his story about a “street fight”
he got into once.
“So
me, and my buddy Jimmy, start rough housing.”
Arnie
rolled his eyes.
It
was a sunny afternoon on the Fourth of July. They had the family barbeque
planned for months in Mom’s back yard. The smell of grilled hamburger and
chicken wafted through the air, making his mouth water. Cora bounced the baby
on her knee while she smiled wide and gave her husband her full attention.
“Jimmy,
the knuckle head that he is, gets pissed off and starts a real fight after I
mention he owes me twenty bucks for cigarettes two weeks ago. He punched me in
the gut too hard, I get pissed off, grab Jimmy by the shoulders, and bite his
ear off!”
“Ew,
Steve!” Cora gasped, her eyebrows scrunching together in disgust.
Arnie
burst out laughing despite how distractingly beautiful Cora was with her perm,
long brown hair, and very little make up.
“You
are so full of shit,” he said. “You were fifteen. Me and Mom broke that fight
up and Jimmy busted you really good in the jaw.”
Steve
glared at him.
In 1990, Steve died in that fucking rig. Two
months after Cora and Steve had a second boy.
It wasn’t just the gun Steve gave Arnie which
he cherished. Two years before Steve died, they had some work they had to do on
the car after another driver flew past him by running a red light. They got it
running while they were teenagers, but Steve often helped Arnie give it tune
ups.
“I
think you fried your clutch,” Steve said after a few minutes of failing to get
the car to move.
“Great.
I can’t believe that moron pulled in front of me.”
“I
can’t believe you tried to stop in the wrong gear,” Steve said. “This car is a
baby. I told you it was when I decided you’d be the one to keep it.”
Arnie
threw a greasy towel at his head. “You gave it to me because it’s too flashy
for Cora and the kids.”
“Are
you kidding me? Cora loves this car. She’s always asking me to get it from you
so we can go for a drive.”
Arnie
wanted to answer his brother, but he shook head at Steve and threw a greasy rag
at his brother’s head. “Well, while we’ve got it open, does it need anything
else?”
Rag
still on his head, Steve fiddled around some more with the engine.
“Oil
change. Your spark plugs look rough. Did you let Mom drive o Vegas again?”
“Well,
she couldn’t take the station wagon.”
Steve
shook his head and threw the rag off his head on the side of the car. “Arnie,
come on. I’m going to have to take the car from you. I go out of town for two
weeks and everything on the car starts falling apart. I didn’t almost get my
jaw unhinged trying to get Jimmy to stop being an ass and help us just so you
could let it rot like this.”
“Calm
down. It just needs a little maintenance. What’s wrong?”
Steve
sighed and closed the hood of the car.
“I’m
just tired of being on the road all the time.” Steve walked over to the driver’s
door and leaned against the car, as Arnie had been the entire time. The hood
was up and one of the tires were also flat from the near-accident which caused
Arnie to need Steve in the first place. I haven’t told Cora, but I really think
I want to stop driving a truck.”
“What
would you do? You used to love driving trucks.”
“Yeah,
Arnie… but driving all the time takes time away from Cora and the kids. You’re
there a lot for them but it doesn’t feel right to have my brother be there for
my wife when I can’t be.” Steve’s hair was still long, and he brushed it out of
his face. As adults, both Arnie and Steve kept mustaches and had gained a
little weight, Arnie more so than Steve.
Arnie
clapped his brother on the back.
“Steve,
you know I love Cora. You couldn’t have chosen a better girl. But you need to
think this through before you quit your job.”
“I
don’t want to raise my family in the city. I think I want to move out of
Philly.”
“What?”
Arnie wasn’t sure if he was stunned or not.
“Yeah…
Cora always talks about how she used to live in in the south a year before she
decided she wanted to move up north. We don’t want the kids in a city
environment. I want to raise them on home cooking and—“
“Steve,
I love you, but good luck getting that past Mom.”
Steve
had always been a big dreamer. Arnie just never thought he would dream about
something so different.
“I’m
just thinking about it. It doesn’t mean I’m going to,” Steve said.
“If
you moved down there, I’d never be able to keep this car running,” Arnie said.
Steve
laughed and pulled out a cigarette. “Yeah, I know Arnie. That’s why I’m
thinking the whole moving idea is a bad idea, even though I want to do what
Cora wants.”
Arnie took in a deep
breath and set about cleaning the pistol, inspecting the bores. They were
tarnished and rough-looking. The entire gun looked dull and neglected. His
cleaning kit sat on his bed, each bore brush and cleaning cloth neatly lined up
against his pillows.
He couldn’t help but
remember his brother. Losing Steve hit everyone hard when it happened four
years ago, but Arnie had to stop and remember to breathe slowly as he picked up
a bore brush and inserted it into the gun. He hadn’t touched it since Steve’s
funeral.
“Arnie?”
Arnie sighed when his
mother knocked on his bedroom door. Mom was in her early sixties and sounded
like a fishwife when she raised her voice. Arnie frequently had to endure her
nagging. Mom let him live at home. Arnie didn’t have to pay rent, but he still
insisted on helping her pay the utilities. Mom owned some property, and she
rented it out to roomers who sometimes came to her for cigarettes and beer.
Some of the guys she let rent from her weren’t the best people, and so Arnie
wanted to live with her at home so he could make sure she was safe. Mom always
refused to work a practical job because she didn’t have the skills. She
inherited the property she owned from Arnie and Steve’s dad once he died. They
lost their dad when they were young.
“Arnie? Come out here for a
minute. Lauren called.”
“All right, I’m coming,
Mom.” Arnie sat on his bed for a moment longer and studied the gun before he
closed the barrel and set it on his nightstand.
“Well, hurry! I haven’t
got all day. I have to go over to the house in Doylestown and ask the tenants
there why they haven’t paid rent yet this month.”
Breathing heavily,
Arnie stretched, popping his back. He unchained his door and opened it. “I told
her I’d call her when I was ready.”
“What have you been
doing?” Mom looked Arnie up and down.
Arnie didn’t think of
himself as much to look at. He was slightly overweight. His belly hung over his
jeans. He scratched the bald spot on the crown of his head as he looked at Mom.
“I, uh, got out the
Colt.” Arnie shuffled his bare feet on the cool tile of the floor.
“Oh, you brought that out?” Mom put her hand
on Arnie’s shoulder. “Are you okay? It’s getting pretty close to January.”
“I’m fine.” Arnie shrugged Mom’s hand off his
shoulder. “Is Lauren still on the phone?”
“No,” his mother said.
She brushed her short curly hair behind her ears. “Where are you taking her
tonight?”
“I don’t know; somewhere
fancier than the usual diner.”
Arnie’s mother took in
a sharp breath. “Are you finally going to propose?” A wide smile spread on her
face. Her hand shot to his arm. “It’s about time!”
“It’s just her
birthday. I might just decide I don’t want to drive far and take her to the
Spaghetti Warehouse.” Arnie thought about shaking Mom’s hand off, but he
didn’t.
Arnie felt like he was
in a good place with his girlfriend. Cora introduced Arnie to Lauren at a
Tupperware party. Cora temporarily sold it in an attempt to have something to
do a year after Steve died. Neither one of the girls were the slight bit interested
in Tupperware now. Cora focused more on painting, her real passion, and Lauren
was attending community college while she worked as a night desk receptionist
at the hotel Arnie worked at as an electrician. Arnie stalled starting a family
after Steve died. Maybe it was because he was afraid the same thing would
happen to his family if he got married—he’d have a few good years with his
wife, have a few kids, and then die on them.
“That’s still a really nice
restaurant.” Except, Arnie thought to himself, his entire family ate there
regularly. “It’s about time you give me grand babies. Have you both gotten more
serious?”
Arnie thought about
that for a moment. He peaked back into his room and looked at the black box
which sat next to his Peacemaker. He didn’t have his bedroom door opened so he
could hide the box. If Mom saw it, she’d become so excited, Arnie would be
afraid she would have a heart attack. “Ah, I like her.”
“Oh! That reminds me,” Mom
said. “Cora is bringing the kids over this weekend.”
“Aw,” Arnie said. “I
have to work a little overtime at the hotel this weekend.”
Arnie thought he
sometimes worked too much, but his relationship with Lauren wasn’t what
suffered. His relationship with Cora and his niece and nephews suffered. He
tried to spend time with them as much as possible. The kids were the closet
thing Arnie had left of Steve, besides the Colt, and it broke his heart they
didn’t have a father.
“It’s okay.” His mother
pushed her glasses onto her face. “Well, I’ll leave you to get ready. Lauren
asked me to tell you to make sure you pick her up at seven-thirty.”
Arnie told her he would
get her at nine. He looked at his watch. It was six-thirty. Lauren consistently
tried to move time around on him. She had a controlling personality, and most
of the time Arnie let it go. He was nowhere near ready to go out, though. He
needed to shower and finish cleaning the gun.
“All right,” he said to
his mother. He kissed her on the cheek. “Why are you going to collect rent so
late?”
His mother flashed a
semi-evil half-grin. “Don’t ask, dear.”
Arnie didn’t ask.
Thirty minutes later,
Arnie had on a nice t-shirt and slacks. He had the box in his right pocket
along with his keys and wallet. His mother’s house was large. With three floors
and five bedrooms, and a large basement and attic, it was sometimes an arduous
walk from one end of the house to the other.
Arnie was almost out
the door when the phone which sat on a table near the front door started to
ring.
“Hello?”
“Arnie! I was hoping to
catch Nadine,” Cora said through the phone.
“Mom’s gone out. I
think she’s breaking into a tenant’s house to collect some rent collateral.”
“Again? I hope she
doesn’t hurt herself. Shouldn’t you be out there with her?”
Arnie laughed. Mom only
broke into a tenant’s house once when she thought they brought drugs into the
place. She didn’t care about privacy laws, and that sometimes got her into
trouble. It was another reason Arnie still lived with her. He didn’t want to
control Mom, but he also didn’t want her to do something stupid.
“She probably is just issuing an eviction
notice.” Arnie said. “Is everything okay? I’m supposed to head over to Lauren’s.”
“Oh! Is it the big
night?”
Arnie stuck his hand
into his pocket and fingered the box. He hadn’t meant to tell Cora he wanted to
propose to Lauren.
“Arnie?”
“I’m still here, Cora.”
“It’s okay. I know it’s
the big night. You don’t have to say anything, because I know it must be
scaring the hell out of you. Just take a deep breath before you do it and don’t
worry—you aren’t making a mistake!”
“Thanks, Cora.” Arnie
said. He heaved a huge sigh of relief. “I needed to hear that.”
“I’m already mom and
dad. I can be sister and brother too.”
Arnie laughed. “Okay. I
have to go. I might not be around to see the kids this weekend, but love you
all.”
“Good luck! Love you
too.”
“I thought you were
NEVER going to get here!” Lauren said as soon as Arnie knocked on her door.
He looked at the
flowers in his hand; a dozen roses. Lauren didn’t even give the flowers a
second thought as she flitted past him. Arnie caught a whiff of her vanilla
perfume and coughed. Lauren always wore too much. Her tall black heels clacked
noisily down her apartment steps as she walked to his red ’75 Corvette
convertible.
Arnie loved his gun and
his car, even though it wasn’t his only one. Arnie also owned a Chevy Malibu he
drove for every-day errands. When Arnie was sixteen, and Steve was fourteen,
Steve helped Arnie restore the Corvette after they found it in a junk yard. The
radiator was busted in from a telephone pole, the owner of the junkyard said,
and it hadn’t been touched since. The hood had been a crumpled mess. For a year
and a half the boys scraped and begged for money from Mom so they could work on
it. Arnie got his first job working at a diner down the street to earn cash
too. Arnie would never forget Steve’s face when they finally started the engine.
It purred. Steve immediately wanted to try to repair another car. Maybe that
was why Steve ended up driving a truck.
“Oh, this car?” More
heel clacking. “I love this one!”
Lauren must not really
like flowers, or else she was just too excited to get out to really notice
them, Arnie reasoned with himself. He placed the flowers on a table near the
front door and closed it. Using a key he had to her apartment, he locked it.
“It makes you look
gorgeous.” He walked down the apartment steps. Arnie actually felt a bit of
indifference toward her light blue dress.
“Don’t flatter me,” she
laughed. “I need a night out on the town. I had a rough day at work.” She ran
her hand through her hair. Lauren usually worked the night shift at the hotel,
as Arnie did. “I can’t believe they
ordered me to come in this morning.”
“You shouldn’t let the
managers push you around. I was actually thinking we would go somewhere nicer
tonight,” Arnie said as he opened the passenger door. Lauren sat down.
Arnie got in on the
other side, and then started his car up.
“So where are we
going?” Lauren asked.
“I was thinking the
Spaghetti Warehouse,” Arnie said.
“Oh, really? But there
are so many carbs there… I’m not sure if I want to do that.”
“They
have salads.” Lauren was very self-conscious about her health, and Arnie tried
to appreciate that about her. He looked down at his gut as he shifted the car
in reverse and put his feet on the gas and released the clutch.
He kept fiddling with
the ring box in his pocket the entire time they ate dinner. Lauren finally
relented to the Spaghetti Warehouse because of the classic Cesar salad, while
Arnie ordered the five layer lasagna and the sampler plate. Lauren kept giving
him confused looks every time he fiddled with something in his pocket, and it
made Arnie more nervous about popping the question.
“So…” Lauren started.
“Ah, hell, I’m just
gonna ask.” Arnie pulled out the ring and opened it. It was a nice ring, with a
large diamond in the middle. He had placed a down payment on it. The engagement
ring was the first part of the whole set, as the wedding ring sat in place
underneath it. It was something Cora recommended when he started looking since
that was what Steve bought for her when they got married. “Lauren, will you
marry me?”
Arnie froze up while he
held the ring up to her. Lauren dropped her salad fork, staring at the ring.
For a moment he thought she was going to say no until she snatched it up out of
the box. She held it between her index finger and thumb, her eyes wide as she
looked at it.
“Oh—Arnie,
of course I will!”
After dinner, Arnie and
Lauren decided to go back to his house to spend some time together. Lauren
couldn’t wait to tell Mom, and Arnie tried to tell her she also had Bingo and a
senior citizen’s meeting, but he decided to go home anyway.
Lauren held his hand as
they walked up the steps to his bedroom.
“You’d have to move out
of your Mom’s house,” she said, wrapping one of her arms around Arnie’s
tighter.
“I’ve got some money
saved, but not much. I thought maybe we could rent a while.”
Arnie knew Lauren would
want him to move out of his Mom’s after they got married. Thinking about it
now, though, made his hands sweat. He wasn’t sure how his mother would do if he
left her alone.
Lauren shook her head.
“I hate renting. I just throw so much money with rent.”
“Mom wouldn’t mind
letting us stay here. She doesn’t make me pay rent.”
“I really, really don’t
want to live with your Mom, Arnie.”
Arnie opened his
bedroom door. His light was still on as he ended up rushing around to get ready
before his date with Lauren. He got nervous right after his talk with Mom. The
Colt was still on his bed.
“Oh, you have that
out,” Lauren said as she walked into his bedroom. She sat on a chair toward the
end of the bed which sat next to the wall.
Arnie quickly picked up
the gun and shut the barrel. He picked up the bore brush kit and closed it and
shoved the bullets into his nightstand. “It was a gift from my brother.”
“Yeah… isn’t it old?
Worth something?” Lauren sat up straighter in his chair. Arnie sat on his bed
and placed the gun on the nightstand on top of the bore brush kit.
“Yeah. It is. Did I
ever tell you the story Steve told me when he got it?”
“No, you didn’t.”
Lauren stood and sat next to him on the bed. She placed her hand on Arnie’s
knee. “Could you?”
“Steve was always full
of it. I think you would’ve liked him. He said he got this gun from John
Wayne.”
“No way!” Lauren
laughed loudly. She startled Arnie when she slapped him on the shoulder. “So
it’s old then?”
“It’s an 1873 Colt
Peacemaker,” Arnie said. “Classic.”
“But isn’t John Wayne
dead?” Lauren asked.
“Yes. Steve didn’t pay
attention to that stuff. John Wayne may have owned it,” Arnie picked up the gun
and showed it to her. “Steve probably just found it in a pawn shop, and the
person who had it didn’t realize what it was worth.”
“That’s so fascinating. How much do you think
it’s worth?”
Arnie shrugged,
suddenly feeling uncomfortable with the way Lauren was phrasing her questions.
People had asked him how much the gun was worth before, after Steve gave it to
him. For a while, Arnie did let people see the gun. That was before Steve died.
“It’s invaluable.”
“Maybe we could sell
it—and the Corvette. Can you imagine what kind of money we could get toward the
wedding and a down payment for a house?”
Arnie suddenly stood
up. “You know I worked on that car with Steve.”
“You really need to let
his death go. It’s pathetic.”
Arnie’s back stiffened.
He felt some of his hair stand on the back of his neck.
“Are you really telling
me you want me to sell the two things I have left from my brother?”
“Oh, come on, you have
pictures of him or—“
“I’m not marrying you!”
Arnie hated raising his voice, but he didn’t know any other way to grab
Lauren’s attention. “Give me the ring back.”
“What?” Lauren’s eyes
widened. “I’m trying to be practical.”
“Cora and Mom want me
to be on my own but they’d never suggest
I get rid of my gun and car. We’ve been together a year and you haven’t realized
that?”
“I’m not Cora.” Lauren
stood up and crossed her arms.
“Yeah, you sure aren’t.
Give me the ring back.”
“Fine! Whatever.” Lauren
yanked the ring from her hand. “It looks stupid anyway.” She threw it at his
chest. Her heels clacked against the floor as she walked down the hallway.
Arnie was breathing
hard. He didn’t know when he started breathing hard. He looked at the gun. Had
he really just broken up with Lauren?
He
needed to go somewhere.
It was only 9:30. He
could go see Cora. Arnie hoped the kids were still up—Zack, Cora’s youngest,
looked just like Steve.
He knocked on Cora’s
door. Children squealed and a dog barked as the dead bolt on the front door
unlocked.
“Arnie? I thought you
were on a date with Lauren?” Cora asked. She had her hair piled atop her head
in a messy pony tail. Kyle, three years old, stood next to her. He smiled wide
when he looked up at Arnie.
“Could I spend time
with you and the kids?” Arnie asked Cora.
“No problem! Are you
okay? Did she say no?” Cora asked. She stepped out of the way to let Arnie
inside.
“She just wasn’t what I
thought I wanted.” Arnie bent down and immediately picked up Kyle, hugging him
tightly as his other nephew and niece attached themselves to his pant leg.
“I—what do you want?
Because, Arnie, I think I’m going to follow Steve’s dream and move out of the
city.”
Arnie looked up at Cora
sharply, a deep, painful burn suddenly building in his chest.
“How long have you been
thinking about doing this?” he asked.
“I’ve been thinking
about it for a long time… I don’t want you to say anything to Nadine! She’d be
so mad… but I think I might have found a job down there. I started looking when
you told me you wanted to get married to Lauren.”
Arnie looked down at
Kyle, still clinging to his pants.
“You can’t move, Cora,
what about the kids?”
“I really think they
are going to do better. The job I found, it’s working with horses, and—“
“It’s an incredibly
stupid idea!” Arnie said, raising his voice. He raised his voice so loud, Kyle
jumped back, tears welling up in his eyes. His niece stood there too, startled.
“Um, kids,” Cora said.
She knealt down to them, and gave them a hug and a kiss each. “Can you go up to
bed? Mommy will be upstairs in few minutes to tuck you into bed.”
“Okay, mommy,” Arnie’s
niece said. “I love you, uncle Arnie! Night!”
“Night, kids…” Arnie
almost couldn’t get the words out. He almost couldn’t look at his brother’s
kids.
“Arnie, I don’t know
what is going on with you… and you can stay the night, but I think you need to
call Lauren in the morning and try to fix things with her. If I want to move
with my kids, I will, because I want to have the chance to give them a better
life, something I don’t think I can give them in the city. You can sleep in the
basement, in on Steve’s old pull out sofa.”
Arnie wasn’t sure what
to say to his sister in law. He wasn’t even sure what he was doing there,
trying to be there for his dead brother’s kids and his dead brother’s wife.
“Cora, haven’t you ever
thought about us—“
“Don’t, Arnie!” Her
voice broke. “Just don’t. Good night, I have to tuck the kids in.”
